


sky daddy fan club!

by bratainamerica



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - After College/University, Alternate Universe - Group Chat, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bad Parent John Winchester, Bisexual Sam Winchester, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Chapter 3 is Cas centric, Charlie Bradbury & Dean Winchester Friendship, Crack Treated Seriously, Dean Winchester Has Self-Worth Issues, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Doctor Castiel (Supernatural), Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Fake Prom, Firefighter Dean Winchester, Fluff, Fluff without Plot, Group chat, He/Him and They/Them Pronouns for Sam Winchester, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, It's literally just the gang being happy, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Kinda, Law Student Sam Winchester, M/M, Non-Binary Sam Winchester, Openly Bisexual Dean Winchester, Openly Gay Castiel (Supernatural), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Prom, Sappy, Song: cowboy like me (Taylor Swift), Texting, They're added with each chapter, also mary's dead :/, but it's S O mild they just talk a bit of shit abt john, but its normally dean centric, but theyre used as a j o k e, dean and cas are dating but they're also just vibing no lovey dovey stuff yet, dean's gay and homophobic, he'll deal with them eventually maybe, he's literally awful i hate him so much, i love them S O much, idk what charlie's doing but she's vibing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-12 15:14:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29386860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bratainamerica/pseuds/bratainamerica
Summary: daphne blake: i was just asked to join a pyramidscheme.mr. business man: dean, don’t do it.beyoncé?!: do it and then let me join.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dorothy Baum/Charlie Bradbury, Michael/Adam Milligan
Comments: 1
Kudos: 22





	1. chapter one - dean and sam go to therapy challenge

**Author's Note:**

> hey y'all, i'm ollie, and this was spawned as a joke, and it will be very much a joke. i just wanted to make a funny groupchat fic making fun of my favorites, and i did. cas and dean are established btw, and there will be n o other ships for the two of them. they're just a happy and healthy couple. i do want to say this is a human au, and the ages are  
> cas - 27  
> dean - 25  
> sam - 21  
> charlie - 20  
> but yeah, that's it. comments and kudos are appreciated! hope you enjoy!!
> 
> warning: i joke abt dean and sam's codependency but i p r o m i s e no wincest. there will be none. i fuckin hate wincest, so i promise there's none, it's just a joke. 
> 
> mr. business man - cas  
> beyoncé?! - sam  
> wendy’s drive through - charlie  
> daphne blake - dean

**sky daddy fan club!**

_ 2.35 am _

**mr. business man** : dean winchester is moira rose kin.

**beyoncé?!** : proof.

**mr. business man** : drinking problem and dramatic.

**wendy’s drive through** : wait… you’re onto something 

here. 

**beyoncé?!** : don’t disrespect moira rose like that please.

**mr. business** **man** : it is my fourth time watching this 

show i will do as i please.

**wendy’s drive through** : fourth time ever? l a m e

**mr. business man** : fourth time this week.

**wendy’s drive through** : oh okay 😌

**daphne blake** : why do you know what kin 

means? you didn’t even know 

what a daddy kink was.

**mr. business man** : i was on tumblr in 2012.

**daphne blake** : understandable have a nice day.

**wendy’s drive through** : why did dean have to explain 

what a daddy kink is?

**daphne blake** : 🏃♂️💨

**wendy’s drive through** : ✍️ dean✍️ has ✍️ a ✍️ daddy ✍️ 

kink ✍️

**wendy’s drive through:** good to know.

**mr. business man** : i hate it here.

**beyoncé?!** : what was tumblr like in 2012?

**mr. business man** : not it.

**daphne blake** : i can’t do it. i’m sorry. i was a gl** stan. i 

physically can not.

**wendy’s drive through** : why didn’t you have it in 2012

**beyoncé?!** : i was 12 in 2012? why d i d you have it 

charlie? ur younger than me.

**wendy’s drive through** : i’m gay.

**beyoncé?!** : oh. ok.

**wendy’s drive through** : [tumblr2012.png]

**beyoncé?!** : is that- is that dean?

**mr. business man** : please, don’t pull me back in.

**daphne blake** : no. that is not me.

**wendy’s drive through** : it is. he did go bonkers over 

the post once when i brought it 

up.

**daphne blake** : sorry, how many followers do you have 

on tumblr again?

**wendy’s drive through** : 15k

**daphne blake** : that’s what i thought. 

**daphne blake** : wait no it’s not. i lied i’m sorry

**mr. business man** : did you have that’s what i thought 

pre-typed

**daphne blake** : yes 😗✌️

**mr. business man** : anyway charlie, i have you beat. 

**mr. business man** : 25k

**wendy’s drive through** : PLEASE TELL ME YOURE 

KIDDING

**mr. business man** : im not. i went to tumblr prom.

**wendy’s drive through** : how old are u?

**mr. business man** : i-

**daphne blake** : he’s 27.

**mr. business man** : that’s not that old.

**wendy’s drive through** : ok old man.

**mr. business man** : i’ve never been called old before i 

don’t know what to do.

**daphne blake** : thats a you problem.

  
  


**sky daddy fan club!**

_ 1.25 pm _

**daphne blake** : i was just asked to join a pyramid 

scheme.

**mr. business man** : dean, don’t do it.

**beyoncé?!** : do it and then let me join.

**daphne blake** : yeah okay, that’s valid.

**business man** : dean. no.

**daphne blake** : dean. yes.

**wendy’s drive through** : dean. what?

**wendy’s drive through** : oh! a mlm. nice.

**daphne blake** : thank you. cas, charlie says i should do it

**wendy’s drive through** : no i didn’t. what the fuck man?

**beyoncé?!** : do it, no balls.

**mr. business man** : dean. no.

**daphne blake** : mhmm my two least favorite things. the 

reminder of my existence and the word 

no.

**mr. business man** : go to therapy.

**daphne blake** : i do.

**mr. business man** : dean, bars are not therapy.

**daphne blake** : fuck man, can’t i have one thing?

**beyoncé?!:** omg the girls are fighting 

**wendy’s drive through** : omg

**mr. business man** : dean.

**daphne blake** : my name doesn’t feel real anymore.

**mr. business man** : hm.

**daphne blake** : what’s hm.

**mr. business man** : hm.

**wendy’s drive through** : ooo mr. business man means 

business

**beyoncé?!** : [shhh.jpg]

**wendy’s drive through** : no ❤️

**beyoncé?!** : oh my bad.

**wendy’s drive through** : why’d they leave?

**beyoncé?!** : hate sex

**mr. business man** : we’re not having sex. i have surgery.

**daphne blake** : i hope your patient dies

**beyoncé?!** : dude what the fuck-

**daphne blake** : it be like that sometimes

**wendy’s drive through** : it do not be like that. what the 

fuck?

**beyoncé?!** : bruh you scared cas away.

  
  


**sky daddy fan club!**

_ 8.32 pm _

**mr. business man** : despite dean’s kind words, my 

patient didn’t die.

**daphne blake** : oh that’s cool ig

**mr. business man** : i do think you forgot im only a 

resident though

**beyoncé?!** : “i do think you forgot” is it the 1940s?

**mr. business man** : no it’s 2021

**wendy’s drive through** : i’m gonna fucking lose it.

**beyoncé?!** : lose what?

**wendy’s drive through** : it.

**beyoncé?!** : by stephen king? great book.

**daphne blake** : yo, cas are you coming home for dinner?

**mr. business man** : can’t, i’ll be home around 2.

**daphne blake** : brb. coping.

**wendy’s drive through** : how?

**daphne blake** : i have been listening to cowboy like me 

for two hours straight.

**beyoncé?!** : is that taylor swift?

**daphne blake** : fuck i forgot im not supposed to be gay 

around you.

**beyoncé?!** : why not. i’m not cis OR het

**daphne blake** : you ARE a child.

**beyoncé?!** : an not. 

**wendy’s drive through** : you just spelled a two letter 

word wrong.

**beyoncé?!** : sorry gifted kid burn out

**daphne blake** : imagine being a gifted kid. couldn’t be me

**wendy’s drive through** : didn’t you skip two grades?

**daphne blake** : not on purpose 😎

**beyoncé?!** : dad put him into school a couple years late 

and lied and said he was home schooled.

**daphne blake** : and then i dropped out of highschool. 

**boyncé?!** : he got his ged later tho.

**wendy’s drive through** : wait, if you didn’t go to college, 

how’d you meet castiel

**daphne blake** : it’s actually a funny story

**mr. business man** : no it’s not.

**beyoncé?!** : he’s back!

**mr. business man** : hello 🐝 

**wendy’s drive through** : wait shut YOUR up i wanna 

hear dean’s funny story.

**daphne blake** : ok. ok.

**daphne blake** : so- once i was in a car accident! it’s fine, 

i’m completely fine obviously. but i 

WASNT at the time and cas was an 

intern at the time and he was on trauma 

and he was assigned me cuz i was dyin 

and shit. but instead i flirted with him. and 

he flirted back, so they kicked him off my 

case cuz you can't flirt with a dying 

patient apparently. and then i went into a 

coma wnd fucking died, but i came back! 

and when i came back, cas was pissed at 

me cuz apparently i had good surgeries 

and he missed out. and i asked him if i 

could make it up to him by buying him 

coffee

**mr. business man** : you had great surgeries.

**daphne blake** : you got a boyfriend instead.

**mr. business man** : meh- 

**daphne blake** : w o w

**wendy’s drive through** : did you just casually drop that 

you were in a coma

**daphne blake** : [🏃♂️💨.jpg]

**mr. business man** : i think we do.  


**daphne blake** : hmm. no

**beyoncé?!** : i agree cuz that means that i have to discuss 

my feelings too. and i’m not emotionally 

prepared for that.

**|** **_wendy’s drive through changed the group name to “dean and sam go to therapy challenge”|_ **

**dean and sam go to therapy challenge**

_ 9.15 pm _

**daphne blake** : this isn’t it

**beyoncé?!** : rip sky daddy

**mr. business man** : dean and sam: i’m fucking fine

also dean and sam: *have been 

mistaken for boyfriends multiple 

times because they’re so 

codependent due to trauma* 

**wendy’s drive through** : [breakingnews.png]

**beyoncé?!** : i- i’m passing away

**daphne blake** : cas we’re breaking up.

**mr. business man** : pity.

**beyoncé?!** : that was such a sad break up im mourning it.

**daphne blake** : wait i was just kidding i thought he’d be 

sadder.

**mr. business man** : sorry, no.

**daphne blake** : i’m suddenly straight

**beyoncé?!** : charlie made that meme and then fucked off 

i just K N O W she’s posting it somewhere

**mr. business man** : she posted it on instagram. 

**daphne** **blake** : f u c k


	2. chapter 2 - my etsy shop is b o o m i n

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mr. business man: i love when dean is the first one to  
> text in the groupchat cause it always  
> gives me a gauge about how much  
> bullshit i have to deal with

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey gang! hope everyone in the southern part of the u.s. is doing well w/ the snow. coming from the north, please be careful, snow can be really dangerous!! thank u so much for reading! hope you enjoy!!
> 
> xoxo, ollie!

**dean and sam go to therapy challenge**

_ 10.55 am _

**daphne blake** : not to be horknee on main but cowboys rt 

if you agree

**wendy’s drive through** : the inherent homoeroticsm of 

liking cowboys is astronomical.

**daphne blake** : what can i say i am bisexual

**mr. business man** : i love when dean is the first one to 

text in the groupchat cause it always 

gives me a gauge about how much 

bullshit i have to deal with. 

**daphne blake** : this feels mean

**mr. business man** : good.

**wendy’s drive through** : mhmm get me a relationship 

like that.

**daphne blake** : get a girlfriend

**wendy’s drive through** : you get a girlfriend.

**daphne blake** : i already got one.

**mr. business man** : not a girl.

**daphne blake** : i know ❤️ i wasn’t talking about you.

**mr. business man** : oh.

**wendy’s drive through** : oh?

**mr. business man** : oh.

**daphne blake** : uh oh

**beyoncé?!** : did i miss anything, you guys woke me up.

**wendy’s drive through** : dean and cas broke up again.

**daphne blake** : no we didn’t.

**mr. business man** : eh-

**daphne blake** : oh.

**beyoncé?!** : oh?

**daphne blake** : oh.

**mr. business man** : uh oh.

**beyoncé?!** : well we’re going to be lonely for a few hours

**wendy’s drive through** : do we need more people in the 

chat?

**beyoncé?!** : do we know other people?

**wendy’s drive through** : well dean has his friends,

**beyoncé?!** : okay, true. i think theyre straight tho.

**wendy’s drive through** : aren’t you straight?

**beyoncé?!** : come on, my favorite movie is dead poets 

society you really think im straight?

**wendy’d drive through** : that’s fair ❤️

**beyoncé?!** : exactly, i’m non-binary and bi

**wendy’s drive through** ; aw sick, pronouns?

**beyoncé?!** : he/they

**wendy’s drive through** : the bliss of having a no hetties 

allowed groupchat

**beyoncé?!** : exactly.

**wendy’s drive through** : sam, i love you, and we just had 

a great heart to heart. but im 

bored as fuck.

**beyoncé?!** : can’t believe i miss the married couple. brb 

passing away

  
  


**dean and sam go to therapy challenge**

_ 4.24 pm _

**wendy’s drive through** : buy from my etsy shop

**daphne blake** : i’m poor

**beyoncé?!** : no you're not. i’m poor

**daphne blake** : ha pussy

**beyoncé?!** : sorry not all of us have sugar daddies

**daphne blake** : i have a job.

**mr. business man** : not a sugar daddy. and not poor

**beyoncé?!** : wait deadass

**mr. business man** : huh? did you think i was???

**beyoncé?!** : yeah?? kinda???

**wendy’s drive through** : i thought you were a sugar 

daddy too

**mr. business man** : dean did you think i was a sugar 

daddy???

**daphne blake** : no…

**mr. business man** : liar.

**daphne blake** : guilty ❤️

**wendy’s drive through** : sorry cas ur the richest of us.

**mr. business man** : meaning?

**wendy’s drive through** : ur legally obligated to buy from 

me.

**mr. business man** : fine what do you sell?

**wendy’s drive through** : i program peoples pcs to have 

marvel bots

**daphne blake** : wait that’s so cool. i want.

**wendy’s drive through** : thanks it’s 200 dollars,

**daphne blake** : please i do not have 200 dollars

**wendy’s drive through** : it comes with pins of your 

choice

**daphne blake** : i suddenly have 200 dollars

**mr. business man** : no you don’t.

**daphne blake** : you do…

**mr, business man** : no.

**daphne blake** : yes.

**mr. business man** : no. 

**daphne blake** : yes.

**mr. business man** : fine

**wendy’s drive through** : thanks cas!

**daphne blake** : where’d sam go?

**beyoncé?!** : sorry the rich people were talking,

**wendy’s drive through** : sorry my etsy shop is 

b o o m i n

**beyoncé?!** : oh. damn. think if i sold my feet pics on etsy 

i’d make bank?

**wendy’s drive through** : mens’ feet should never be 

shown in public 

**beyoncé?!** : shit, i’m gonna be poor forever now.

**daphne blake** : don’t you want to be a law boy

**beyoncé?!** : law boy

**daphne blake** : i’ve seen your email.

**beyoncé?!** : shit.

**mr. business man** : are we bullying sam?

**beyoncé?!** : no

**daphne blake** : yes.

**mr. business man** : for once, i’m listening to dean.

**wendy’s drive through** : cas’ roasts are mean uh oh.

**mr. business man** : samuel can you please stop leaving 

five minute voice mails at three am. i 

am a surgical resident. i spend 18 

hours at a hospital and do not want 

to come home and before forced to 

listen to a five minute voice mail 

when frankly, i find the sound of your 

voice quite grating. but i’m forced to 

listen to the full voice mail because 

of your brother, and i love your 

brother, and i care about you. but 

please just send me a text like every 

other gay person.

**beyoncé?!** : god cas that WAS mean

**daphne blake** : ha cas said he loves me.

**beyoncé?!** : dean.

**daphne blake** : op, sorry. 

  
  


**dean and sam go to therapy challenge**

_ 3.35 am _

**daphne blake** : am i a twenty five year old male who’s 

never been in a manipulative 

relationship? yes.

**daphne blake** : have i been bopping to dear john by 

taylor swift for the past three hours? also 

yes.

**daphne blake** : deeEEEEAAAAR J OOOO H HAHA N 

i see it all now that yOuRE GOAHNE

don’t you think i was too YOUANG

  
  


**dean and sam go to therapy challenge**

_ 7.00 am _

**_|beyoncé?! changed “daphne blake”s name to “swiftie forever”|_ **

**dean and sam go to therapy challenge**

9.00  _ am _

**wendy’s drive through** : those aren’t the lyrics?

**swiftie forever** : yes they are what the fuck

**wendy’s drive through** : no they aren't.

**swiftie forever** : [shutthefuckupcharlie.png]

**swiftie forever** : try me bitch.

**wendy’s drive through** : oop u caught me

**swiftie forever** : fake fan (derogatory)

**wendy’s drive through** : shut up. i’m being hate crimed

**mr. business man** : that’s not a hate crime.

**wendy’s drive through** : well i hated it.

**mr. business man** : dean fucked up my spotify ratio

**beyoncé?!** : why doesn’t dean have his own

**swiftie forever** : i can't afford premium

**mr. business man** : yes you can.

**swiftie forever** : fine i just like seeing cas’ music choices 

**swiftie forever** : they’re awful by the way.

**mr. business man** : >:(

**swiftie forever** : and i love him for it!

**beyoncé?!** : *whip noise in the background*

**mr. business man** : oh i didn’t know dean told you about 

our sexual exploits

**beyoncé?!** : gross cas! tmi.

**swiftie forever** : i’m gonna leave the gc.

**wendy’s drive through** : no wait. don’t leave. i want to 

hear more

**mr. business man** : no you don’t. 

**swiftie forever** : (dm me)

**wendy’s drive through** : i don’t want to know anymore 

(okay)

**mr. business man** : i can see the parentheses

**swiftie forever** : ignore them.

**mr. business man** : ok. 

**wendy’s drive through** : we need a family meeting

**swiftie forever** : alright i’ll take attendance. everyone say 

here

**mr. business man** : here

**beyoncé?!** : here

**wendy’s drive through** : present.

**swiftie forever** : here

**beyoncé?!** : charlie and i decided we need more friends

**mr. business man** : no we don’t.

**swiftie forever** : i agree.

**beyoncé?!** : well fuck you. charlie and i are the youngest, 

making us the cutest. and giving us the most 

power

**swiftie forever** : how the FUCK does that work.

**beyoncé?!** : it just does.

**mr. business man** : okay fine.

**beyoncé?!** : wait really i didn’t think that would work.

**mr. business man** : whatever who are we adding

**wendy’s drive through** : do we have to add to this 

groupchat? this ones so sexy

**mr. business man** : yes. im not having two groupchats 

with you guys

**wendy’s drive through** : no straight people @ dean

**swiftie forever** : only three of my friends are straight. and 

they’re all from the firehouse

**beyoncé?!** : shit wtf i didn’t know that

**swiftie forever** : yeah man. i have friends outside this 

group?? none of them are straight

**beyoncé?!** : am i the ONLY boring one here?

**mr. business man** : yeah, even i have friends.

**wendy’s drive through** : imagine being more boring than 

cas.

**swiftie forever** : hey, don’t do cas like that

**wendy’s drive through** : sorry, handmaiden

**swiftie forever** : suck a dick.

**swiftie forever** : but seriously sammy, your life is so 

boring

**beyoncé?!** : ugh i’m being bullied, peace out 

**mr. business man** : rip sam winchester 

**swiftie forever** : fly high king 🕊👑

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments and kudos aren't expected, but they make my day!


	3. chapter 3 - it's a core memory 🥰

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wendy’s drive through: alright gang  
> swiftie forever: let’s split up,  
> beyoncé?!: shut the fuck up dean.  
> wendy’s drive through: anyway! what was your senior   
>  prom like?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello my lovelies! i'm sorry this took so long. i hope you are having a wonderful day. thank you so much for reading, stay safe, healthy, and i hope you enjoy!
> 
> xoxo, ollie
> 
> wendy’s drive through/hermione granger - charlie  
> swiftie forever - dean  
> beyoncé?!/ron weasley - sam  
> mr. business man/harry potter/kim- cas  
> kourtney - gabriel  
> kanye - kelly  
> kris - michael  
> kylie - hannah  
> kendall - anna  
> khloé- jimmy

**dean and sam go to therapy challenge**

_ 9:24 am _

**wendy’s drive through** : alright gang

**swiftie forever** : let’s split up,

**beyoncé?!** : shut the fuck up dean.

**wendy’s drive through** : anyway! what was your senior 

prom like?

**mr. business man** : my principal and i got high together

**beyoncé?!** : i had sex in the teacher’s lounge

**swiftie forever** : i dropped out march of senior year 😎

**wendy’s drive through** : junior prom?

**beyoncé?!** : i spiked the punch bowl

**mr. business man** : i had a threesome in the bathroom 

**swiftie forever** : i was not allowed to go.

**wendy’s drive through** : huh? dean do you have any 

school dances under your belt?

**swiftie forever** : one!

**wendy’s drive through** : what was it like?

**swiftie forever** : idk my dad picked me up a half hour 

before i was supposed to go

**wendy’s drive through** : picked you up from where?

**swiftie forever** : haha cas had a threesome

**beyoncé?!** : wait don’t change the subject i never knew 

abt this

**mr. business man** : yeah, i’m intrigued

**swiftie forever** : uhh remember when u were 12 and u 

had to go live with bobby for a lil while?

**beyoncé?!** : yeah, dad told me you ran away.

**swiftie forever** : of course he did. we ran out of money 

and i couldn’t get into any bars to get 

money and i ended up getting arrested 

for stealing. they sent me to a boys 

home. when dad found out he told me to 

rot there. i deserved jail if i was gonna 

get caught. but i had a life there, i was a 

wrestling champion, i had a gf, and a 

father figure. he was gonna adopt me. i 

was gonna go to my first school dance 

and dad showed up. hit me a couple 

times. hit sonny a couple times, some 

other stuff too and i couldn’t stomach 

leaving you alone with him longer than i 

already had so i left. and idk it was the 

only chance i had of a normal life until i 

was 23.

**wendy’s drive through** : i hate your father SO fucking 

much

**mr. business man** : what’s his location? i just want to talk

**swiftie forever** : he fucked off like three years ago, we 

haven’t spoken to him since then.

**mr. business man** : john winchester… it’s on site.

**beyoncé?!** : you stayed with dad after i left?

**swiftie forever** : you left, dad left, i was alone so i came 

to cali to find you. ur my kid sammy, i 

couldn’t leave you alone

**beyoncé?!** : damn dean that sucks. thanks tho

**swiftie forever** : s’all good, i’ll kick dad’s ass one day

  
  


**|** **_castiel made a new chat with charlie and sam_ ** |

**|** **_new chat was named “dean winchester support group_ ** **|**

**|** **_charlie changed “charlie”’s name to “hermione granger_ ** **|**

**|** **_charlie changed “castiel”’s name to “harry potter”_ ** **|**

**|** **_charlie changed “sam”’s name to “ron weasley”_ ** **|**

**dean winchester support group**

_ 10.53 am _

**harry potter** : really?

**hermione granger** : what? it fits.

**harry potter** : fine. anyway. i have a thought.

**ron weasley** : i thought i smelled smoke.

**harry potter** : that’s a sign of a stroke.

**ron weasley** :i thought that was rotten eggs

**harry potter** : i’m a doctor

**ron weasley** : a resident

**harry potter** : still a fucking doctor????

**harry potter** : anyway! my thought,,, i wanna give dean a 

prom

**ron weasley** : ur gay

**harry potter** : yeah 🥰🥰

**harry potter** : i will wax poetic abt him one fuckin second

**hermione granger** : no we understand how you feel abt 

him. ur relationship haunts my 

thoughts 

**harry potter** : hmm too late someone called me gay

**hermione granger** : [samophobic.jpg]

**ron weasley** ; i’m gonna make that my background

**hermione granger** : good.

**harry potter** : when i say i would die for dean winchester i 

mean it. he is the most caring human being 

on earth, he has changed my world view in 

the best way possible. he’s so kind, and 

cares about everyone so much. he just 

loves and he’s funny, and he’s sarcastic 

and bull-headed. and everyone sees him 

as angry and or rude but he’s so 

passionate about everything, and when 

talks about something he’s passionate 

about, his eyes light up and his voice gets 

higher and he gets so fucking happy. and 

he looks at me and gives me this dorky 

smile and i feel free. bc that’s how he 

makes you feel, and god he’s just so 

fucking cute. i love him. i am a human 

being but first and foremost i’m in love with 

dean winchester 

**ron weasley** : hmm okay. i realize my mistake

**hermione granger** : i can not believe you two invented 

love

**harry potter** : ANYWAY, i wanna give him a prom, bc he 

deserves it and he didn’t get to have one 

and my prom changed me

**hermione granger** : okay! i agree!! i’ll help you plan it.

**ron weasley** : fine fine i’ll help you too.

**harry potter** : thank u :)

  
  


**keeping up with the novaks**

_ 5.16 pm _

**kourtney** : everytime i remember lucifer isn’t in this 

gc bc he’s in prison my brain goes numb

**kim** : i may be a novak but i’m a kelly kline stan 

first and foremost

**kanye** : castiel ur my fave ❤️

**kim** : i know ❤️

**kourtney** : u ever think abt how cas is the most well 

adjusted of us?

**kim** : wait i am?

**khloé** : he is?

**kendall** : proof.

**kourtney** : anna,,, you joined a cult at 16. also ur a 

ginger. i am a h*t*r*s*x**l. jimmy had a child at 

21,,, on purpose. kelly,,, is not s novak but she 

had sex with lucifer once and now has his 

child. and now her and cas have shared 

custody over said child???? ily jack. hannah

was 10 when they stopped saying they wanted 

to marry cas when they were older. theyre 16. 

lucifer is in prison,,, for murdering five people. 

and michael,,, michael is a mess. 

**kris** : i am not a mess. fuck you gabe

**kim** : remember that literal war you and lucifer had where 

you ended up having a duel on live tv and you s h o 

t him? and now you’re dating a nineteen year old 

that you met through my boyfriend because it’s his 

half-brother.

**kris** : please leave me alone, i am sleeping.

**kim** : michael-

**kris** : i will call the attorney general this was an attack

**kanye** : doesn’t michael own a lance? and a sword?

**kris** : yes their names are thelma and louise don’t be 

fucking rude

**kylie** : mom pick me up im scared

**khloé** : mom hates us

**kylie** : as she should ❤️

**kourtney** : yeah, fuck naomi ❤️

**kendall** : wait how is cassie well adjusted tho?

**kim** : im a doctor and i have a boyfriend

**kris** : ok mr. doctor. i have a boyfriend too. 

**kylie** : aren’t you on house arrest

**kris** : i’m trying my best

**kourtney** : michael shut the fuck up this is why we left u 

at walmart

**kris** : shut up walmart’s my worst fear

**khloé** : i think it would be funny if we got lucifer a 

contraband phone in prison

**kourtney** : he’s tried to kill everyone in this family at least 

once

**kim** : no! 🥰 i still go to therapy bc of his ✨abuse✨

**kanye** : me too! twins!!!

**kim** : mhmm kelly i love u even if u look like offbrand 

aubrey plaza

**kanye** : she’s hot it’s okay

**kylie** : this house is a fucking nightmare

**kendall** : omg they cursed-

**khloé** : shut up- omg

**kourtney** : hannah,,, welcome to the big kids club

**kylie** : can i stop sitting at the kids table during 

thanksgiving now?

**kris** : no ur staying there til youre 21

**kylie** : ur boyfriend’s under 21

**kris** : he will be sitting there too

**kendall** : why?

**kris** : i am not allowing him to sit at the same table with 

dad, mom and auntie amara

**kourtney** : mhmm remember when auntie amara tried to 

fuck dean

**kim** : yeah it’s a core memory 🥰

**kanye** : wait i don’t know this story!

**kourtney** : ooo! buckle up, bitch

**kanye** : yes, ms. frizzle

**kourtney** : so when cas and deano started dating, cas 

brought him to thanksgiving, but amara 

showed up late as hell and thought dean was 

a new staff member, and started flirting with 

him and dean was so uncomfortable but he 

didn’t want to say anything bc,,, u know,,, he’s 

dean. and she tried to kiss him and sleep with 

him and he was literally the standing emoji 🕴 

and then cas was like “oh amara u met my 

boyfriend, dean.” and she left our house and 

didn’t come back for like a year. 

**kim** : a good chunk of them have tried to fuck dean at 

least once

**kanye** : raise ur hand if u have tried to fuck dean 

winchester

**kris** : hey

**kendall** : a regret

**khloé** : t’was a joke but yeah

**kourtney** : hmm it’s debatable but yeah

**kim** : i succeeded.

**kanye** : obviously.

  
  


**constantine 😤 → honeybee 🐝**

_ 6.25 pm _

**cas** : hey were going to charlie’s tonight.

**dean** : huh? why. don’t you have off?

**cas** : yes, that’s exactly why were going. use your brain

**dean** : sorry i lose all my braincells around you. you stop 

my functioning 

**cas** : i could tell because that sentence gave me a small 

stroke

**dean** : shut the fuck up >:( this is a threat

**cas** : all threats are ignored when you use >:(

**cas** : it’s like you think i won’t find you adorable 

**dean** : i’m not adorable im manly

**cas** : hm, i think you’re adorable

**dean** : shut up. ur being romantic

**cas** : yeah, i love you a lot

**dean** : i love you too. but shut up before i get sappy

**cas** : yeah yeah. just remember charlie's be ready at 

eight. dress nicely

**dean** : what do you mean by nicely?

**cas** : a suit?

**dean** : what the fuck

**cas** : do you trust me?

**dean** : always.

**cas** : then wear a suit and be at charlie’s by eight. i’ll meet 

you there

**charlie’s apartment**

_ 7.55 pm _

Castiel looks around the room, the lights Charlie picked out glowing a soft purple and blue, covering the room in an ethereal glow. They had decided to go a cheesy route with white and silver balloons and cheap streamers. How Charlie had managed to get Dorothy to make a balloon arch baffled him but he was still thankful for her. 

Charlie’s apartment was the best for this type of event. A medium sized place with a killer sound system that Dean went to often enough it wouldn’t seem suspicious. Really it worked out perfectly. 

“Let me fix your tie,” Charlie grins, grabbing Cas’ tie and pulling him closer. “How long have you been dating Dean?”

Cas grins wider thinking of his boyfriend, “A year and a half,” Charlie raises an eyebrow. 

“You’ve been dating him for that long and you still can’t tie a tie?” Castiel sends her a wobbly glare.

“Fuck off.” It was light hearted, both of them letting out a soft laugh. “Time?” Charlie looks at her watch, pushing back the sleeve of her blazer. 

“8:01.” She says, Cas’ eyes furrow, she moves her hand from Castiel’s tie to his arm. “Don’t worry, Dean is always slightly late, you know that.” 

He did know that. It had come to the point that when they left the house, Cas would tell Dean an earlier time. Even then, Dean was always a little late. He loved that about Dean though, loves the way Dean always fights him on the fact that they're going to be late and gives him an iron hard glare when they are. Dean deserved this. Castiel feels his pulse quicken, and he grasps Charlie’s hand in his, kissing her knuckles.

“Thank you, Charlie.” 

Sam’s in the corner, Cas sees him chewing on a celery stick because, of course Sam is eating the only healthy thing. Sam sends him a thumbs up and a grin and he looks like a teenager. Granted, that’s pretty much what he is, and Cas always forgets about that. Sam is barely old enough to drink, and Charlie isn’t. Cas had to commit a crime to get the alcohol to the apartment.

But, hey, it was for an  _ authentic  _ prom experience. 

Dean shows up exactly seven minutes later. Cas hears the doorbell ring and the music stays on, some Kansas or Metallica song playing, he doesn’t know. Charlie apparently had a playlist made for them for forever. Charlie opens the door, her purple suit blending in beautifully with the silver balloon arch and blue and pink lighting. 

The song switches from Kansas to Troye Sivan because apparently they’re in some cliché movie, and they need a queer artist playing as Dean walks through the balloon arch. 

But, seeing Dean now, is like seeing him for the first time again. His black suit ironed and fitting him in all the right places, his bowtie tied perfectly, after all, Dean had always preferred them, his hair was gelled just the way Dean loved it and Cas feels all the air leave his body. 

Dean Winchester was truly, completely and utterly beautiful. 

And Castiel Novak was truly, completely and utterly in love with him. 

Dean looks over at Cas, and it is cliché, but Cas grins. A gummy grin that has Dean raising an eyebrow. “What the fuck is this?” He asks, not unkindly, still for a split second Cas freezes. 

“Well, you said you never had a prom. So, I gave you one.” He watches the younger man blink once, then twice. Then he lets out a laugh, turning into the greatest smile Cas has ever seen from him.

“ You did this for me?” Cas nods before pausing. 

“Well, Charlie and Sam helped.” 

Dean gives Cas a large hug, burying his neck in Castiel’s shoulder. Cas hugs him back. “Thank you for this. It was really sappy, but thank you. This is a big chick-flick moment.” 

“You deserve it.” Dean pulls away and pushes Cas’ shoulders lightly. “You deserve all the chick-flick moments.” 

“Shut up.” 

The music changes to Taylor Swift judging by the fact that Dean’s head perks up. Cas quickly realizes it’s  _ cowboy like me _ , and gives Dean a hand. 

“Care to dance?” Dean shakes his head, before giving Cas a hand and Cas pulls him close, one hand holding Dean’s and the other on Dean’s waist. 

They dance slowly, Cas stopping in the middle to give Dean a little spin. Dean groans at that before coming back to his spot and looking down at Castiel. “Thank you for this, I know I already told you this, and I don’t say this often.” He pauses, Cas cocks his head to the side like a puppy, “But, thank you.” 

“Of course, Dean.” Cas replies, looking up slightly at Dean and catching Dean’s lips in his for a sweet kiss. “I love you.” 

Dean grins, “I love you too.” 

The song ends, yet another Taylor Swift song playing, this one happier and more upbeat. Cas grabs Dean’s hand once more, pulling him towards the alcohol. “If you want the  _ real  _ prom experience you need to get drunk and then have sex in the bathroom.”


End file.
